Organisations that provide information, advice and support on personal relationships and sexuality

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Compiled by the Information Officers at the Muscular Dystrophy Campaign.

Forming personal relationships and being sexually active are both natural parts of being human, and disability should not be a barrier to either. However it might be more difficult for a disabled person to get out and about to meet people and in some cases there may be a need for help with sexual activity, for example, regarding positioning.

This factsheet aims to direct you to organisations that can provide information, advice and support on issues surrounding personal relationships and sexuality.

Contents:


How to meet a friend or partner

If you feel isolated or have difficulties in getting in touch with other people, meeting new friends or finding a partner there are a number of things you can do:
  • If you have access to the Internet you can use chat rooms and dating sites. Be aware of the potential risks when using the Internet and the fact that you do not know who you are actually talking to. You can read more about safety and Internet chat rooms on www.chatdanger.com
  • Take up a hobby or join a club. This can be a good way to meet other people with similar interests.
  • Go for holidays with a specialist holiday provider that offers group trips, such as Vitalise (www.vitalise.org.uk)

    If you would like to get in contact with other people affected by muscular dystrophy or related neuromuscular disorders you can:
    • put a note on the Community pages of this website, or advertise in our quarterly magazine Target md
    • join a Muscular Dystrophy Campaign Branch;
    • join the muscular dystrophy support network by volunteering your email to peers;
    • join one of the condition specific support groups;
    • attend events arranged by the Muscular Dystrophy Campaign or one of the support groups.

    There are also organisations that offer activities specifically aimed at supporting disabled people to make friends and take part in social events.

    PHAB Clubs
    There are over 300 PHAB clubs throughout the UK that provide opportunities for disabled people to enjoy various leisure activities alongside able-bodied people. PHAB also runs holiday courses on topics such as crafts, arts and sports.

    Summit House
    50 Wandle Road
    Croydon, Surrey, CR0 1DF
    Tel: 020 8667 9443
    Fax: 020 8681 1399
    Email: info@phabengland.org.uk
    Web: www.phabengland.org.uk

    Outsiders
    If you feel isolated, dejected or afraid to make an initial move, Outsiders can provide support and opportunities to meet friends and/or partners.

    BCM Outsiders
    London WC1N 3XX
    Tel: 020 7354 8291
    Email: info@outsiders.org.uk
    Web: www.outsiders.org.uk
    Outsiders also runs a National Sex and Disability Helpline.
    Tel: 0707 499 3527

    Relationships

    It can sometimes be difficult to make your relationships work. When one partner or a child is disabled this can potentially put further pressure on the relationship. If you find yourself in a relationship that is not working well for you, there are organisations that can provide support and advice on how to make it work better.

    Relate
    Relate provides advice, relationship counselling and sex therapy. It runs over 600 counselling centres in England, Wales and Northern Ireland.

    Tel: 0845 456 1310
    Email: enquires@relate.org.uk
    Web: www.relate.org.uk

    Relate Scotland (formerly Couple Counselling Scotland)
    Relate Scotland provides free confidential counselling through its 14 local couple counselling services for people experiencing relationship difficulties.

    18 York Place
    Edinburgh EH1 3EP
    Tel: 0845 119 6088
    Fax: 0845 119 6089
    Email: enquires@couplecounselling.org
    Web: www.couplecounselling.org

    Sexuality

    Regard
    Regard offers information and support for and on behalf of disabled lesbians, gay men, bisexuals and transgender people. It also campaigns to make sure lesbian and gay issues are on the disability movement’s agenda and that there is gay representation on all major committees.

    Unit 2J, Leroy House
    436 Essex Road
    Islington
    London N1 3QP
    Tel: 020 7688 4111
    Fax: 020 7688 4114
    Email: regard@dircon.co.uk
    Web: www.regard.dircon.co.uk

    Genetic issues

    If you or your partner are a carrier of a neuromuscular disorder then your children can be at risk of inheriting the condition. You can ask your neurologist about inheritance patterns for the condition you are affected by or request referral to a clinical genetics service. The clinical genetics service will also provide information and support around the issues of pre-natal screening and, if appropriate, elective termination. The Muscular Dystrophy Campaign has produced a factsheet on Inheritance and the muscular dystrophies (you can also order this as a hard copy from the Information and Support Line on 020 7803 4800 or freephone 0800 652 6352 at info@muscular-dystrophy.org).

    Antenatal Results and Choices (ARC)
    ARC is a national charity that provides support and advice through the antenatal testing process.

    73 Charlotte Street
    London W1T 4PN
    Helpline: 020 7631 0285 (Monday to Friday 10am-5.30pm)
    Email: info@arc-uk.org
    Web: www.arc-uk.org

    Family Planning

    Family Planning Association (FPA)
    The FPA provides an information service on all aspects of family planning, sexual and reproductive health.

    50 Featherstone Street
    London EC1Y 8QU
    Tel: 020 122 8690
    Helpline: 0845 310 1334 (Monday to Friday 9am-6pm, except for Thursdays when the helpline is closed between 3-4.30pm)
    Fax: 0845 123 2349
    Web: www.fpa.org.uk

    Brook
    Brook provides advice about sexual health and counselling for emotional or sexual problems for people under 25 through a network of offices around the UK. It also offers emergency contraception.

    421 Highgate Studios
    53-79 Highgate Road
    London NW5 1TL
    Tel: 020 7284 6040
    Fax: 020 7284 6050
    Helpline: 0800 018 5023 (Monday to Friday 9am-5pm)
    Email: admin@brookcentres.org.uk
    Web: www.brook.org.uk

    NHS Direct can provide information on family planning.
    Tel: 0845 4647

    Websites

    www.sexualhealth.com - This website has personal stories on facilitated sex and how to rediscover sexuality after disability or illness. N.B. Quite explicit.

    www.likeitis.org - This is a website for young people that talk about sex in a straight forward way. The site has information on everything to do with sex and sexuality. It also has links to organisations that provides support to teenagers and youngsters.

    www.disabledfriends.com - This is a global and interactive virtual portal for disabled people. Where you can create new friendships as well as discuss issues that affect disabled people in their daily lives. Before using the service read about security on chatdanger (see below).

    www.chatdanger.com - This is a website with information about Internet chat rooms and safety.

    Publications

    The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability: for all of us who live with disabilities, chronic pain & illness (ISBN: 1573441767)
    By Miriam Kaufman, M.D., Cory Silverberg and Fran Odette. Publisher: Cleis Pr (Dec 2003). This guide is aimed at those individuals who do not want to let an illness determine the quality of their sex lives. It addresses topics like how to build a positive sexual self-image and adapting sex toys to make them work for you. 308 pages. Available from Amazon (www.amazon.co.uk) and similar on-line booksellers.

    To find more books about sexuality and disability, including books for teenagers and young adults, visit the following two Internet sites:

    Publications by the Family Planning Association
    The Family Planning Association sells a wide range of books covering topics such as sexuality and relationships, personal development, sex education and women's health. Visit www.fpa.org.uk

    Publications by Contact a Family
    Contact a Family has published three booklets; one for young disabled people, one for their parents and one for teachers called Growing up, sex and relationships. You can order the booklets by calling its helpline on 0808 808 3555.

    Related factsheet from the Muscular Dystrophy Campaign: